I've been thinking about writing an online journal for a good while already. Maybe something more like a diary, as I don't know if I'll have time to sit down and write anything daily. I've been feeling washed up for past few weeks, pretty much some events related to my family made the air feel so heavy...
Sudden death of distant relative always was eerie situation for me. People I know, who are my family but I didn't really knew them well or saw them many times. I think about how few years ago my father called on I think... second day of Christmas and notified me that my aunt, who lived in France, has died. Or when my other aunt from my father's side has died some more years ago. I met first one I think once when I was like 10? I'm not even sure about it. But with other aunt... I saw her pretty much more frequently and I actually miss her. Getting to know about her death was so abstract for me back then. I just feel that my emotional emptniess is multiplied inside of me and I try to feel sad... but I feel more confused when it happens.
I started reading Solaris again and first time it feels so fluid and understandable compared to heavy feeling I got from it earlier. Very likely I'm gonna read again Memoirs Found in a Bathtub soon after finishing Solaris. I wish I read it in entirety before. It predicted world where data loss occured, but time passed and shown that paper survived better than current technology will... I have a fear that this forced digitization of the world, cybernetic world will be disasterful for our knowing, culture and quality of what we consume. Lem's visions of the future rightfully became his fears.
I should visit library and see if his later, non-fiction works are available.